Dude, I just rear-ended a cab
Are you drunk?
A little...yes
Run!
Terrible brother advice.
So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
I don’t care if there’s a pandemic. My husband gave me a hall pass for my 40th birthday and I’m going to use it!
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