Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night.
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
Just got drunk at the Cheesecake Factory again. Made me think of you.
That's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me.
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
Randomize
