I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
I kind of drew a blank when the doctor asked me how I got super glue up my nose.
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize
