I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
I feel like my sweat is 40 proof right now
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
Randomize
