Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
if i were to get pulled over right now, the only thing i would be guilty of is listening to 90's Mariah Carey
Mars, I'm going to name my child horatio mars. He will hate me till he gets high. Then he'll understand
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
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