Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
Two word: claymation porn. Think about it.
I don't think I can ever express my appreciation for the things you text me.
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
Randomize
