I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
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