I'm jealous of your bromance
i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
Not gonna make it. His stripper neighbors are playing a Super Bowl drinking game that involves removing my clothes
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