turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
So this guy is eyeing me from across the bar. Either the girl I hit on next to him is his girlfriend or he's her gay best friend. I should show him my Penis and find out.
Dude. Do it.
Definitely her date. But she saw it too. So now he used to be her date. Why can't this stuff Happen when I'm sober?
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
I cannot believe this. A potential 2016 Olympiad wants my vag. To which I respond "GO FOR THE GOLD"
you have to be that girl in the audience holding up the sign that says i fucked the shit out of you
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
She said I had a really great aura. Which I think is hippie code for "I bet you can give me a mind melting orgasm"
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
Randomize
