hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
Randomize
