I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
I told him I'd ride his broomstick if he let me call him Harry Potter and drew a lightning bolt on his forehead.
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
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