one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
Emergency nipple ring removal:vodka, tweezers, and vodka. Can you bring me a band-aid?
bringing my vibrator into the shower with me. if I don't text back in 30 minutes I have electrocuted myself and died.
May the force be with you.
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
Randomize
