4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
I'm sorry I kept calling last night when you wouldn't pick up. I'm REALLY sorry I sang "You Oughta Know" on more than 4 voice mails.
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
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