i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
there's no such thing as luck on your birthday, only drunken invincibility, make it happen
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
MIDGETS
????
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
Randomize
