love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
if i die of alcohol poisoning tonight, just know i kinda expected it and totally deserved it
i came home at 4 a.m. and made a dozen eggs and three lbs. of bacon. my mom woke up and the only thing she was pissed about was that i used the whole carton of eggs, but then she sat down and ate with me
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
Randomize
