I thought he was gonna sex me but then he ran to my bathroom and jerked off
she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
Idk if my headache is from the alcohol, the pot brownies, or being dragged down 8 flights of stairs by my ankles because i passed out in the 12th floor girls bathroom by you. Probably a combo of all three.
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
Randomize
