He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
Dad's drunk, trying to hook me up with a 43yo, and keeps saying one and done. Mom is on the verge of tears and disowning us. You missed a good birthday dinner.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize
