Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
My vag has a bald spot. That is so middle aged. Is this my midlife crisis?
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
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