i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
How am I still drunk? Whoever said breakfast is the most important meal obviously didn't skip dinner and go drinking.
I'm destined to be knocked up by a sailor
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
I fell asleep after the worst sex of my life and now I'm snowed in with him. SEND HELP. CALL FEMA. GET ME OUT OF HERE.
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
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