So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
I'm drive I can fine osifer
How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
I just told a bottle to be chill
and meant it
Honestly I was sitting in managerial accounting thinking "I really need to get my shit together and stop drinking so much wine." But when you asked I realized... it's wine. It's always a yes.
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Randomize