My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
i took my goldfish out of his bowl last night and put him in my bed
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
He passed out with his shoes on 20 minutes till midnight, and I didn't have a sharpie so I took the cheese whiz and filled his exposed ass crack.
You don't make any sense
TEQUILA
Randomize
