i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight?
I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me.
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
But theres a keg here and me gusta
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
You’re going to be a doctor, and I’m going to be a trophy wife. We both have goals
Randomize
