so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila"
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
I'm just crazy horny about you
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
Tell me why i have 60 matches in 72 hours on tinder. Can i sell my tinder account like people used to sell their myspace pages and tumblrs when they had a lot of followers? Is that a thing?
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
Randomize
