yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
my fart just smelled so bad i acutally gagged
just because you are now my girlfriend does not mean you can text me nasty shit
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
Randomize
