you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
There are huge fuckin pieces of palm tree in the road. what a road hazard. as i sit here and text you as i swerve to miss them
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
Do you remember me asking for jerk off videos from Tinder guy?
Nah I don't remember that being part of the criteria
Randomize