You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
I'm pretty sure I just had a convo with my hot pockets about how they weren't good enough for the oven.
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
Ughh I think I'll just sit here in the dark and wallow in self-pity while drinking wine and knitting scarves for my future cats.
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
Randomize
