Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
He threw a goldfish cracker into my toilet and then proceeded to laugh for 32 minutes. I timed it.
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
I changed my birth control schedule so that I'm on my period while you're gone this week
I don't deserve you.
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
Randomize
