she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
The Russian stripper asked if I like foreign girls. I told her I absolutely fucking hate accents. Most awkward 7 minutes ever
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
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