Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
Ever have the mailman look at you like youre a chronic masterbator. I have.
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
Randomize
