Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
I woke up at 1pm, looked in the mirror and fist pumped...I might still be drunk
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
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