some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
Let me clarify that those tears were for losing my fuck buddy and his penis, not to the fact that he decided he wanted an actual relationship with feelings.
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
You sent me snap chats of you guys having sex. Like plural. It was like flip book porn, I'm traumatized.
My doctor wrote down abstinence as my form of birth control. #ihavenodatinglife
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
Randomize
