No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
I'm in Target and the lady in front of me is buying three Summer's Eve douches, a box of fishsticks and a giant bottle of vodka. The sad thing is I get it.
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
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