yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
masturbating is 5million times harder to finish knowing grandma is in the guestroom downstairs. just so you know.
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
