belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
you were mass sexting so we took your phone away
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
Uh I almost got the bride to go down on me. I'm the smoothest maid of honor ever.
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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