quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
sitting in my room eating a boneless rib tv dinner, and listening to taylor swift's love story, and i sharted. had to finish the ribs and hear the end of the song before i went to the bathroom to wipe.
I'm so drunk I cant read cursive anymore.
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
Randomize
