You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
a dead guy is trying to sell me oxy clean on my tv
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
Sorry if that was awkward, i will never call you sober ever again
Randomize
