she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
Good news!! I can adult!! 😂 turning down the strip club on a weeknight has become my crowning achievement ðŸ˜ðŸ˜‚
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
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