the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
He left his own bachelor party to bring me weed. Then smoked with me. Tell me I'm not his favorite-ex-friends-with-benefits.
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
I'm running on two hours of sleep, a shot of vodka, and half of a granola bar. I can't be held responsible for what I do.
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
Randomize
