well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
Randomize
