Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
He just texted me from the outside of the hospital. He called the fat broad in the bar mrs snuffleupagus about 60 times and she broke a bottle of blackberry brandy over his head.
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
If I die, sorry about rent.
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
Randomize
