everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
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