I hate my date so much right now for even thinking I want to do the electric slide.
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
OK, the bar's closing. Do I go to home to my wife or my girlfriend?
I just found a bag of teeth...
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
Im just a social blackout drinker.
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
Randomize
