We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
His pick up line was "your one sexy pumpkin, I'd love to carve." Why would you let me go home with him?
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
Well I just put wine in my tea
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
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