i just wanna soil my oats bro
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
My Adderall prescription says to take my recommended dose and throw away any leftover pills. Why don't more prescriptions come with jokes like this?
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
Can I just say I love that you have a kegorator on your wedding registry?
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
Randomize
