I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
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