You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
Oh? And how would you explain this to your kids?
"Well pumpkin, when mommies and daddies have loved each other so much for a really long time, sometimes they trade off with other mommies and daddies"
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
Randomize
