I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
you had me at cake vodka
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
Randomize
