is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
Yet again my drunken self has managed to find his way into the middle of nowhere with no shoes or recollection of what happened last night.
Then I guess you don't remember me driving you there after you tried making out with my girlfriend, dipshit.
I didn't know it was possible to throw up mid-sneeze.
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
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