He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
Sometimes I get depressed that my son is too young to understand how hot his babysitter is.
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
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