they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
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