Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things 🙈😐
My life has come down to me literally sitting on an uncrustables trying to defrost it because I’m drunk alone and hungry.
Literally been in their house 5 minutes and I've projectile vomited all over the bathroom wall. The dog licked it up though so I think it's cool.
Randomize
